Day 7
Day 7 - The Art of an Apology
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"You have heard that it was said to those of ancient times, ‘You shall not murder,' and ‘whoever murders shall be liable to judgment.' But I say to you that if you are angry with a brother or sister, you will be liable to judgment, and if you insult a brother or sister, you will be liable to the council, and if you say, ‘You fool,' you will be liable to the hell of fire. So, when you are offering your gift at the altar, if you remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother or sister, and then come and offer your gift. Come to terms quickly with your accuser while you are on the way to court with him, or your accuser may hand you over to the judge and the judge to the guard, and you will be thrown into prison. Truly I tell you, you will never get out until you have paid the last penny.”
Mt 5:21-26
THE ART OF AN APOLOGY - MEDITATION
Verse 23 of this chapter of Matthew is the flip side of Matthew 18:15 that we meditated upon earlier. And like that passage, it can also be considered one of the least understood, appreciated and practiced passages in the New Testament and of the teachings of Jesus. Unfortunately rare is the person who can truly live out both sides of this scriptural coin – to forgive and to apologize in the hope of reconciliation. One such person is Velma.
Velma was raped at the age of fourteen by an older man. Unable to talk about that sex
ual abuse with anyone, she buried the pain but started acting out by drinking and partying. Years later, she fell in love with that man's brother and eventually married him. So, her rapist became her brother-in-law. She then lived in the same small northern community of less than 200 people as her brother-in-law. Despite what had happened, she was very involved in the church, even serving as chair of the small parish council and leading communion services in the absence of a priest. However, she had a very angry edge to her, which puzzled her pastor. One reason might be that her brother-in-law was the organist!
One day that man's son, her nephew, molested her 13-year-old daughter. They moved to her home community. Years later, I received a phone call from her. Now her son had molested her granddaughter. She blew the whistle and had him sent to a detention home in the south. Then she fell apart – three generations of sexual abuse in her family. Knowing she was a member of Alcoholics Anonymous, her pastor encouraged her to go on a 12-step healing journey, and she did.
After working steps 4 and 5 and confessing how she had acted out of anger because of her unresolved abuse, she wrote a step 6 letter to her brother-in-law. In that letter, she practiced the stages of forgiving she had learned during workshops conducted in her northern community: Ask permission to share; remind the abuser of his or her hurtful behavior; share your feelings about the abuse and the impact it had on your life; let go of the outcome and thank the abuser for the opportunity to grow personally and spiritually.
So, in her letter Velma simply reminded him of his abusive action towards her decades earlier, and shared how she felt at the time, how it had impacted her life, and how she still felt about the incident. She communicated her hurt with love (no name-calling, revenge or attempt to get even) as a way of forgiving him, and living the teachings of Jesus described above.
Shockingly, she then apologized to him for the way she had treated him for over 35 years, got up and gave him a hug! She has since danced with him at a community event and sat at a family banquet with him. Velma was truly empowered by Jesus to forgive and lived the gospel passages mentioned above. And now she is working as an addiction's counselor in her home community.
Velma's magnificent gesture is exemplary but all too rare. The most common responses to anyone trying to forgive people are these more common reactions: no response; “it's all in the past; there is nothing to talk about; anger; I took care of it in confession, I stand by my statements,” totally ignoring the feelings expressed, and even “mind your own business.” One 85-year-old person, rather than apologizing, even blamed his victim who was trying to forgive him. When she asked why he had molested her at the age of 8, he replied, “You really want to know – you were 11 years old, and it was because of the way you were dressed!”
In 1991, the Oblates apologized at Lac St Anne in Alberta for their role in the flawed Indian Residential School experience. One lady from the north was there, heard the apology, and walked out of the church for ten years because no one took the time to hear her story.
Given this sad state of affairs, here is a schema for a complete apology: 1) Ask permission to share something personally, 2) Remind the other of our own hurtful behavior, 3) Ask them to share with us their feelings about our hurtful behavior and listen to them without justification or defense, 4) Offer an apology, 5) Make a declaration to change and never offend in the same way again, and 6) Ask how you can make amends to make things right. The declaration to change is important because an apology without a declaration is almost meaningless, as was the case with the 85-year-old man.
The hoped for result is reconciliation, which can be defined as follows: Reconciliation is a renewed relationship when wrongdoing is acknowledged, the victim's pain has been adequately heard, a sincere apology is offered, a commitment to change is declared, amends are carried out to right the wrongs, and forgiveness is freely offered by the victim (Archbishop Emeritus Sylvain Lavoie OMI).
PRAYER
God our creator, how wonderfully you have made us. You transformed dust into your own image and gave it a share in your own nature; yet you are more wonderful in pardoning the one who had rebelled against you. Grant that where sin has abounded, grace may more abound so that we can become holier through forgiveness and be more grateful to you. (Psalm Prayer – Divine Office)
Click on "Prayed" at the bottom of the post when finishing your prayer, and why not take the time to entrust your couple on this page again so that other on Hozana can pray for you by clicking here.
Our Father
Our Father, who art in heaven,
hallowed be thy name.
Thy kingdom come,
thy will be done,
on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day, our daily bread,
and forgive us our trespasses
as we forgive those who trespass against us.
And lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from evil.
AmenSaints of the Franciscan Order
capuchinsistersofstjoseph
Jun 16, 2026
Capuchin Sisters of St Joseph
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St. Angela Merici
St. Angela Merici was born in Desenzano, Lombardy in Italy. She was orphaned with her sister at the age of 10 and they then lived with her uncle in Salo, Italy. Upon the death of her sister, Angela dedicated her life to the service of God in His Church, becoming a Franciscan Tertiary at the age of 13, practicing many severe penances. She loved poverty so much that she lived on alms, slept on the bare earth, and fasted to such an extent that sometimes Holy Communion was her only nourishment for several days.
She was very concerned when her sister died without the last rites, but God permitted her a vision where she saw her late sister in the company of the saints. When she was 20 she moved back to Desenzano upon the death of her uncle and was horrified to see the lack of religious education given to young girls there. She herself taught them their catechism, how to pray, and how to prepare for and fittingly receive the Sacraments.
In 1506, as she prayed in the fields of Brudazzo, Our Lord Jesus Christ granted her a vision in which he instructed her to found an institute where she and other consecrated women would devote their lives to the religious instruction of young girls, helping the poor, and caring for the sick.
She gathered together a group of young women with little to no resources, living in their family homes at first. They would meet together, with St. Angela often reminding them: “Reflect that in reality you have a greater need to serve [the poor] than they have of your service.”
Because of her saintly conduct and profound knowledge of God and the things of heaven, she was regarded by all as a saint, causing her to leave her hometown in 1516 to move to Brescia until 1524.
Even the Pope had heard of her sanctity and attempted to detain her in Rome when she made came back from making a pilgrimage to the Holy Land and the tombs of the Apostles. When he understood that it was by Divine inspiration St. Angela was to found in Brescia, he allowed her to return. However, it was not until 1531 when Angela could perform her intended work, due to disturbances caused by war. Then, on November 25, 1535, Angela and 28 companions consecrated themselves to God, officially founding the Congregation of St. Ursula, or the Ursulines. St. Ursula was chosen as the special patron of St. Angela’s work because she viewed Ursula as the ultimate model of consecrated virginity, intelligence, and spiritual leadership.
At age 70, the date and hour of Angela’s death were revealed to her. Upon receiving the last Sacraments she was wrapt in ecstacy. She died on January 27, 1540 with the holy Name of Jesus on her lips. She lies buried, dressed in the habit of the Third Order and with her pilgrim’s staff in a side chapel of the church of St. Afra in Brescia. She was beatified by Pope Clement XIII in 1807 and canonized in 1807 by Pope Pius VII. Her feast is celebrated by the Capuchins on June 1st.
Boende passerar fontän för att svalka
1 min
Se flamingofontänen som gör livet svalare på äldreboendet i Trollhättan. Foto: SVT
Här svalkar sig Caj i äldreboendets flamingofontän: ”Jätteskönt!”
Uppdaterad idag 15:51Publicerad idag 05:30
Hettan slår mot Sverige med temperaturer upp emot 30 grader.
Då svalkar sig Caj och hans vänner på Nordängens äldreboende i Trollhättan – i en flamingo som sprutar vatten.
Caj Selvin, 71, gör sig redo i sin rullstol, sedan skjuter en ur personalen honom igenom en rosafärgad fontän i flamingoform. Ett ögonblicks dusch under det strilande vattnet är tänkt att hjälpa i värmen.
– Det var jätteskönt, det får vi göra om! säger han.
Idén kom från USA
SMHI har flaggat för temperaturer i Västsverige på över 30 grader och uppmanar särskilt äldre att försöka hålla sig svala.
Efter att personalen genom sociala medier fått nys om att flamingofontänen används på äldreboenden i USA bestämde sig enhetschefen för att ge den ett försök.
– Det blir ett roligt inslag i vardagen att komma ut och få lite svalka och ett samtalsämne, säger Emma Wallentinson, enhetschef.
Väder
Äldre
Äldreomsorg
Trollhättan
Se flamingofontänen som gör livet svalare på äldreboendet i Trollhättan. Foto: SVT
Här svalkar sig Caj i äldreboendets flamingofontän: ”Jätteskönt!”
Uppdaterad idag 15:51
Publicerad idag 05:30
Hettan slår mot Sverige med temperaturer upp emot 30 grader.
Då svalkar sig Caj och hans vänner på Nordängens äldreboende i Trollhättan – i en flamingo som sprutar vatten.
Caj Selvin, 71, gör sig redo i sin rullstol, sedan skjuter en ur personalen honom igenom en rosafärgad fontän i flamingoform. Ett ögonblicks dusch under det strilande vattnet är tänkt att hjälpa i värmen.
– Det var jätteskönt, det får vi göra om! säger han.
Idén kom från USA
SMHI har flaggat för temperaturer i Västsverige på över 30 grader och uppmanar särskilt äldre att försöka hålla sig svala.
Efter att personalen genom sociala medier fått nys om att flamingofontänen används på äldreboenden i USA bestämde sig enhetschefen för att ge den ett försök.
– Det blir ett roligt inslag i vardagen att komma ut och få lite svalka och ett samtalsämne, säger Emma Wallentinson, enhetschef.
Uppblåsbar Vattenspridare Flamingo
Handla denna produkt Uppblåsbar Vattenspridare Flamingo
pris599 kr
antal
Tillgänglighet: LagervaraLeveranstid:1-2 dagar
Art nr: 36030
En både rolig och festlig vattenspridare i form av en rosa stor flamingo, perfekt för alla barn som vill ha skojig lek med en häftig uppblåsbar vattensprinkler och badleksak i sommar. En flamingo vattenspridare blir garanterat en hit under varma sommardagar, ett utmärkt val av vattenleksak till barn kalas.
Uppblåsbar Vattenspridare Flamingo omfattar en uppblåsbar bågformad vattenspridare i form av en rosa flamingo som ansluts via vattenslang. Flamingons bas fylls med vatten för stabilitet. Vattenspridaren har säkerhetsventiler och dräneringsventiler. Flamingon är ca 3,40 meter lång, 1,10 meter bred och 1,93 meter hög. Tillverkad i slitstark PVC plast, lagningslapp medföljer.
Info om Uppblåsbar Vattenspridare Flamingo:
- Bågformad vattenspridare.
- Ansluts med vattenslang.
- Material: PVC plast.
- Mått: ca 340 L x 110 B x 193 H cm.
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